omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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