I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
