I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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