What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
