no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Randomize