8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Randomize
