Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
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