talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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