In the future we'll all be gay
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
i now understand why vodka
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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