is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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