Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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