I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize
