another moral hangover. fuck.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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