When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
