so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Randomize
