I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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