I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize
