The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
