when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Randomize