i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
