I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Randomize
