I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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