My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
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