Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Randomize