I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
