Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
I don't think brook has ever known best
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize