tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
