So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
