i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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