): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
