It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I just gift wrapped bread.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
