Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
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