Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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