She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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