I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
