you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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