If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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