you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
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