it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
