She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I would fuck him just for his dog
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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