i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Sober January is a disaster.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
