Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
