That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I feel great
I just peed on a car
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Randomize
