yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Randomize
