I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
