The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
I can't turn off my feet"
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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