I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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