your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
