Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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