it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
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