Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
