If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
